It's been awhile

My term ends this Tuesday and all the shit for the past 3 months can be put to rest, sigh as much as i want to I'm not actually in that much of a mood to write I don't know why, just feel..bleak, not that i'm too sure what it was that i wanted to say, there's just a void i don't know how to fill, i've keep myself busy rather well, but as this sem is drawing to an end i can't help but wonder with all the free time i'm going to have soon will I mutilate my self once again as my thoughts are allowed to manifest upon them self, It's been awhile though..

And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I first saw you
And it's been awhile
Since I could stand on my own two feet again
And it's been awhile
Since I could call you

And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means

And it's been awhile
Since I can say that I wasn't addicted
And it's been awhile
Since I can say I love myself as well
And it's been awhile
Since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
And it's been awhile
But all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you

And everything I can't remember
As fucked up as it all may seem
The consequences that I've rendered
I've gone and fucked things up again

Why must I feel this way?
Just make this go away
Just one more peaceful day!

And it's been awhile
Since I could look at myself straight
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry
And it's been awhile
Since I've seen the way the candles light your face
And it's been awhile
But I can still remember just the way you taste

And it's been awhile
Since I could hold my head up high
And it's been awhile
Since I said I'm sorry

words by - Staind