hate me.

i have to block out thoughts of you
so i don’t lose my head
they crawl in like a cockroach
leaving babies in my bed

dropping little reels of tape
to remind me that i’m alone
playing movies in my head
that make a porno feel like home

there's a burning in my pride
a nervous bleeding in my brain
an ounce of peace is all i want for you
will you never call again

and will you never say that you loved me just to put it in my face
and will you never try to reach me it is i that wanted space

hate me today
hate me tomorrow
hate me for all the things i didn’t do for you

hate me in ways
yea ways hard to swallow
hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

i’m sober now for three whole months
it’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
the one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing i wont touch again

in my sick way i want to thank you
for holding my head up late at night
while i was busy waging wars on myself
you were trying to stop the fight

you never doubted my warped opinions
on things like suicidal hate
you made me compliment myself
when it was way to hard to take

so i’ll drive so fucking far away
that i never cross your mind
and do whatever it takes in your heart
to leave me behind

hate me today
hate me tomorrow
hate me for all the things i didn’t do for you

hate me in ways
yea ways hard to swallow
hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

with a sad heart i say bye to you and wave
kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that i had made
and like a baby boy i never was a man
until i saw your blue eyes cry and i held your face in my hand

and then i fell down yelling make it go away
just make her smile come back and shine just like it use to be
and then she whispered how can you do this to me

words by - Blue October.